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    Money-a long-winded response :)

    posted by  A. Barber in Germany forum 

    Your english is great. I understood your response perfectly.
    I can agree that sometimes money plays a role in in the happiness of people's lives and I understand the money is only paper, but it's value has caused many wars.
    For me, my most memorable or best moments vary. Some include money (my first car, working two jobs to finance for my education, my first pay raise-woohoo!) and others include more personal moments (new love, accomplishing a hiking goal, drowning my sorrows with friends at a local bar-lol). It is a case by case matter. Many people do not believe in the notion of love and even during these times marry for money, status, or stability (especially where children are involved), however their happines is their determination and no one else's.
    I agree that a realtionship must be equal but the scales of measurement always, in my opinion, differ in each situation. For instance: a woman (or man) chooses to remain at home for the sake of the family while one person supports the family; or,
    one spouse supports the other so the he/she can return to school to further their education; one falls ill..the list can go on. There are so many instances where the flow of cash can, unwillingly, dictate a relationship. It is very rare that many couples earn the same amount of money. Although the person earning less need not look to the other as a bank, the higher earning person will, willing or willingly, become the bank.
    To put my opinion in perspective, I work for a judge and a majority of our case load is dealing with divorces, custody disputes, legal seperations, and, annulments. So, although we may value our own positions and feel we have things figured out, I feell, we never really know who we are until those values must be applied. These times come at very pivotal moments in our lives and only then, do we find out who we truely are. I think it is easy to assess someone else's situation because we lose nothing in the assessment. We can express ouropinion on the matter by telling them how feel about what they are doing or by dictating what we believe is right or wrong without compromising ourselves.
    The point I am trying to make is everyone rates themselves using their own personal scale (most of the time). To expect other's to live their lives by your scale (your values, what you believe is right or wrong) can become troublesome.

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