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Why is it so hard to make friends in Switzerland??

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Is it just me or is it really hard to find some people in Switzerland who are willing to make good friends with you (especially to foreigners)??
I've been there for only 6 months and I heard you need at least 3 months to completely settle down there so maybe I've been there just too short...what do you think?

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  • Pauline Pham

    pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    Genau (exactly) Claudio!!! I've been here since August and can validate what you say. My partner is Swissie and I know from him that lifelong friends are the most important to him (ie.school friends, uni friends, friends he's known for 10years) and there is not much room for "new" friends. I've got instant access to his network of friends and I can tell you that once they like you and trust you, they are very sincere and generous and will stand by you. We lived in Australia for a couple of years (ok, I lived there my whole life, but with him a couple of years) and he made friends but the level of friendship was not so deep and when he went through a tough period, not all those friends could be relied upon, and that I think is the difference between people who tell you you're their "mate" (friend) instantly (very Australian!) vs people who are slow to befriend but then are a true friend. So good friendships take time to develop. It is probably faster to make friends from the expat community though, but don't give up on the Swissies! :-)
    PS. Loud, obnoxious, self-promoting people will have less chance of making friends with Swiss who tend to be conservative and possess much humility.

  • Claudio Enggist

    pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    Vanessa, I don't think you have to worry, if you are willing to give it time and to learn German. But be aware that we speak Swiss German in Switzerland which is considerably different from the German spoken in Germany. Why is the language so important? Let's face it. Whoever comes to the UK without being able to speak English will have a lot more difficulties to make friends than someone who speaks your language.

    Swiss tend to be much more reserved than many other Europeans. This very often comes across as cold or unfriendly. However, I think it has more to do with modesty and a big need for privacy. You do not want to stick out of the crowd in Switzerland. If you do, there must be something suspicious about you. Hence, people rather hold back. They might first observe you a bit, before they start a conversation. If people feel inferior, they might less likely talk to you. This is a strong generalization, of course. At the same time Swiss also don't want to show their weaknesses. Hence, if a Swiss does not speak English well (and many Swiss believe they don't), they will be much more reluctant to talk to you.

    One way to get to know Swiss is to get active in your community, in an association, sports club or whatever interests you. Getting to know people at work is more difficult, as Swiss tend to separate work from their private lives quite a bit (again, this is often true, but not always). However, for all these activities, you need to know German. Hence, get started now to learn German.

    It takes a lot of time and energy to get to know Swiss. But once you do, you can make great friendships that can last for a lifetime. Once a Swiss opens up to you, it is because the trust you and they like you. That might perhaps be a lot different from what you are used to.

  • Vai al profilo di Sonia smith

    pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    I agree with Agostino. Swiss people are known to be un-friendly and cold. I think it is because they are not open-minded and they dont like change so they have a hard time dealing with foreigners in their country.
    A simple greeting can go a long way, many swiss refuse to do this. I have experience in my short stay here, that when you greet people they watch you like shit. In my country greetings are normal.

  • pubblicato da Utente eliminato in Svizzera forum  

    Hi Matthias!
    Besides my personal experience, it's just what you hear all over the world! I don't know why Switzerland (and Germany too, you're right ;)) have a quite "bad reputation", with being described as cold and unfriendly and everything. It's a shame, as I think that most people who say such things, haven't ever been to these countries...

  • pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    Youre sure about that ????
    I mean , normally germany leads such rankings :) But Maybe not so many peoples visit germany and want to live there... not that I can understand this... but ... semms to be a little strange ;)

  • pubblicato da Utente eliminato in Svizzera forum  

    Yes, maybe it's only a stupid prejudice, but you hear more negative things about the people from Switzerland than from any other European country! I wonder why it's like that...

  • pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    hmm.... its the second time for me in switzerland and I'm not having a lot of problems in that area, I mean its not cuba or mexico but its not such a great problem :)
    Be nice and patient;)

  • Liliane M

    pubblicato da  in Svizzera forum  

    Hi Agostini! I heard the same story from many foreigners in Switzerland, so you're not alone ;o). Give it some time and some patience. The Swiss are not exactly open-minded when it comes to meeting new people, but ones you do get to know them you can makes friends for a lifetime!

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