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Why do foreigners always stick with people from their own country?

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I just don't get it! Many people I know that are living abroad constantly complain how hard it is to meet people from the country they moved to. But at the same time, they only meet up with people from their home country and instantly create their own "national circle" once they move abroad. How on earth do they expect to meet nationals then?

Anne Sredzki

  • postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    Dear Kiko,

    I've been through your shoes before and recently because of this website, I found a very nice social group from where I live. Now I am friends with co-foreigners and some Greeks as well. I am getting along with them and they are the type that would love to enjoy life wherever they are. I wish you would try joining expat communities, too. Don't be afraid. Consider yourself lucky that you can travel and live abroad to see different cultures and be a part of it. So take advantage of that. Especially that language is a big problem if you're abroad where English is not very much acknowledged. Understand that your expectations are the ones that can disappoint you. But isn't it sad that you're disappointed before even trying to do something first? So go my dear, don't be afraid. Be brave to meet others! :D

  • Kiko Ora

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    It's actually a hard topic to comment on. I do dislike those who hang around in their own circle, but recently, there are days I feel that I might understand why they do it.

    I used to live in London. I was there for qite a few years. When I was in London, I didn't like to hang around in the Japanese comunity there, because in which were a lot of people who had no interest in learning English, and they just wanted to stay among themselves, saying that they weren't sure if they would be accepted by the world outside of the comunity. Although not everyone were like that, but many enough were, and as a result, I kept quite a distance from them. I mean, if they worry about feeling unsure whether they would be" accepted" or not, why weren't they trying to find out? If they weren't bothered to try, then what on earth were they doing there?

    I am in Kiel, Germany now. A new commer, been here for 3 months now. And will be here for while a while. Maybe forever.

    I hardly speak German at the moment and know no one. I've been quite alone, and dealing with many things including the feeling of being alone very alone. Yes I have been learning the language but it'll take time for me to be able to speak it. I wish I knew where to meet people and everything, then again there is a language barrier.

    Then I recently come to wonder: If I contact an expat comunity in Kiel somehow (although I don't know how), which seems to exist even though it's small, for I feel the need to speak with someone time to time, would I become like those from the Japanese comunity of London?

    It might spell my defet if I start hanging around with the foreign nationals here in terms of meeting the nationals here, but then if the defet saves me?

  • postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    I don't go for that idea ...sorry.

    Probably one of the reasons I don't stick with the community of my own countrymen in a foreign country because you have to be religious or at least be a part of a religion community in order to get them. But this doesn't apply to California where I last lived for more than one year. In Greece, I'm having a hard time looking online for Filipinos in Thessaloniki and so far I caught them in religious community, which practically not my thing. :(

  • Mergi la profilul lui Felipe Di Gregorio

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    Hi all,

    The opinions and stories told were very inspiring and made me thought about this topic. It is very interest indeed because that feeling of depression and loneliness happens more or less to everyone.

    I personally think that going to a foreign country is a very important moment to let yourself surprise and enlighten by a different culture and way of living. It's a time to become mentally flexible and learn about others and about ourselves.

    That requires a change process that as every crisis, can be stressful at first and fulfilling in the end, when the results are shown. In order for this to happen one has to be willing to let this change take place, to challenge what you know and who you are, and that can be a barrier if you are stubborn, proud or just don't want to relate with the new culture because you think it can't do any good.

    In the end it's just a matter of what you are looking for when you travel. If you want to have a different landscape around you or if you want to be enriched by a different culture. I don't think it's good to judge people who want to take either side but we should consider that these enclaves or ghettos might end up creating prejudice, misinterpretation of codes, cultural conflicts or chauvinism.

  • Catherine Shen

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    I feel it's a natural action to stick with the ppl who's from their own country when they lived in abroad,especially at the beginning when they just moved to this foreign country based they have no relation or any friends there.For them,it's a new world.Definitely,they will feel very lonely,and wanna find some ppl to be their friends.

    The feeling will be very great when they can meet some ppl who's from their own country,including some foreigners can speak their language,those things can let them feel very moving and happy.That's no doubt.Anyone loves to communicate each other easily,then the called"society circle" will be built.They can spend a lot of time together.

    But the active ppl will remember their purpose why they are in this foreign country.Then,they will realize they should do some changes.Definitely,they would like to know some foreign friends,to exchange the culture.They will have a try to make some foreign friends,maybe the process is difficult,they can be successful if they can move on.Try to learn language,try to know the country culture that they lived,try to understand,etc.

    Anyway,stick with ppl who's from their country is a good thing,but it's also a mazing thing if they can stick with many native ppl of the foreign country that they lived.Just believe that they can,do it with good efforts,then they will get what they want.

    Cheers,
    Catherine

  • Mergi la profilul lui yj B

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    I think what ever u do u can not be a part of the on new country u moved on and when u found somebody from ur own country u will feel like u r back home. But I think some time it is ok to involve with other if the environment helps.

  • postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    Hello everyone,
    This proverb is said for long time ago, means that ppl are like animals. We all get attracted to our likes. Be it cultural, spiritual, language or hobby. We always get attracted to the kinds of ourselves. It can always be different aspects or occasions. Like some of you commented some ppl find it easier to connect with their landsmen and others with their group of interest. So the main thing is not the gathering itself. Be it your landsmen or someother group, it has to be something developing, positive and encouraging, where you can learn from eachother and get good qualities of manners and attitudes towards others. There are worst gatherings of different people and there are gatherings of give and take experiences. So everyone is born free to do whatever pleases him/her, but if we act positively we always harmonize with our invironmentals.
    Happy acquaintances and happy discussions for you all!
    z-gal

  • Blizzy Everhard

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    I really found this discussion very interesting. So most of you think that it's quite "natural" to stick with people from your home country. I agree that it helps, but what really bothers me are those people that hang around with their own nationality only and that don't seem to bother to even try to meet people from the country they moved to.

    In this case - why did they even move abroad??

  • postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    It is so funny to say that Australian language is sexy.

  • Kylie Anon

    postat de către  în Intreaga Lume forum 

    Not everyone is naturally outgoing or confident, so sometimes it is easier for them to identify with people from their own culture. I think to get angry about that is silly. Because there are SO many people out there, not everyone IS like that, and we shouldnt condemn people who chose to have their experience in their own way.

    Australian accent is sexy :S lol, Im allowed to make fun of that cuz Im a kiwi ;)

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