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Why is it so hard to make friends in Switzerland??

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Is it just me or is it really hard to find some people in Switzerland who are willing to make good friends with you (especially to foreigners)??
I've been there for only 6 months and I heard you need at least 3 months to completely settle down there so maybe I've been there just too short...what do you think?

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  • Daniel Novo

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Hi there,

    Most Swiss friends I have are really down to earth people. Very simple minded but on the best aspect of the expression. They farmers. And I don´t mean that in any bad way. But normally farmers are very closed people.

    Most of them have become my friends through what I would otherwise regard as a very dull period where the only bond was normally a common interest. James Bond movies, for crying out loud. BUT if you stick around long enough eventually this thread expands into a real friendship. Most likely long lasting.

    As I see it, in Switzerland friendship is not a sprint. A conversation at a party, a night out on the town, a cup of coffee. It is about endurance, trust. That might explain also why so many of them go abroad to get married and find friends.

    Being born in Brazil, it took me a while to figure this much out. In fact, I still curse my luck sometimes. But I am sure when and if I leave Switzerland I will also leave some good SWISS friends behind.

    cheers.
    Daniel

  • Prejdite na profil Dino D.

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Dear Adam

    German-speaking Switzerland happens to be the most conformistic place in Western Europe. Anyone who's a little different won't have too many friends, because people can't handle it - even though they're constantly pretending to be open-minded and to have a cosmopolitan mentality. Just look at pop culture and new media: all innovative changes come from abroad, and it usually takes a few years for such innovations to selectively cross the Swiss borders. Which is a pity.

    A truly pluralistic society appreciates and rewards diversity and difference.

  • Prejdite na profil Jim Jackson

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Dear Adam, I am with you. The swiss are sick people and they really need help.They hate anybody that does not fit their stupid profile. Switzerland as a country that hides behing "peacefull place" in the world is nothing but hell for foreigners and everybody in the world should know this. I do not recommand this place for anybody . Be very careful of the swiss propaganda!!!! This is all about attracting money to their country from foreigners... at the end of the day, they are a bunch of racists as all of you have experienced.
    By the way Adam, this s true for all Switzerland no exceptions... read what others are experiencing in other cities of this lousy place.
    Jim

  • Adam Zohs

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    My goodness,I am with you Dino.When visiting as a tourist,I really and sicerely loved Zurich.Now that i am trying to gain residency here,it is a totally different place.The minute people find out that i am trying to marry one of their precious Swiss Women,the tone changes and the answer to nearly anything is the famous dragging,dull toned nooooooooooooo.Over half the time you later find out that the answer should have most definately have been a snappy yes!!!These are government officials I must add.
    The minute you say something like "Thankyou so much you will be helping so much",the mood changes and they put their stamp away.
    Basically from experience,and from what started as a very postive outlook on a place that i really wanted to move to ,i will say - In general Swiss nationals of Zurich are racist and put themselves on this mythical pedastal.It is a seperatist country that doesnt welcome anyone,nor anything that isnt 4th generation Swiss.The men are sooo rude,but when confronted have no spine.Blah,blah...My fiance is Swiss.After our experience with the Swiss Beaurocracy,she has decided to move with me back to New Zealand.She only wants to return back here for holidays now.Her mother cant belive how hard it has been either.
    In closing i came here as an excited,Freshly engaged man - wanting to start my new life,pay my taxes and become part of this 'great' place.I am leaving shattered not by the country,but by its people and their attitudes.
    First though before i return,i am going to pay a visit to Berlin...thankyou Dino.

  • Prejdite na profil Dino D.

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Dear Steven

    There are stupid neo-Nazi minorities in almost every country, and the Antifa is an utterly intolerant and bigoted organization. All extremists, whether leftists or rightists, are equally narrow-minded. So please stop comparing ANYONE with the Nazis. That's just not OK and ethically dangerous.

    Berlin is a different place altogether. There's a lot of conformity in Zurich, simply because it's way too small to be the international metropolis that it would love to be. Conformity and metropolitanism are mutually exclusive. And Berlin is an existentialist experience, meaning that you're free to experiment with social identities. But if you fail to create a new "self", you will be lost. So existentialism in Berlin is relentless. But it's the greatest place on Earth.

  • Prejdite na profil steven wenger

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    zuri people are also really closed and thinking only in money but in zurich you see the people enjoying their money,when you walk in the center in zurich you notice a big diference with the people of bern city.in bern the people dress so so bad it,s horible the swiss women have even dirty clothes on,it,s rare to see people wearing brand clothes.in zurich the people are mostly chick they have style and wear expensive clothes it,s all full of expensive cars like bentleys,porsches...
    in zurich you fell like being in a really rich city,you can find nice bars,the night life is far better than in bern i went many times for party in zurich and laussane becose bern is really dead city im not the clubber guy i preffer to go to bars and pubs where you can still speak.
    in bern you have the feeling of being in a rural ambient even in the city.bern people think in working and money but i dont know for what they want so much money if they even are afraid to spend to much in the supermarket or in clothes in zurich at least they enjoy the money.

  • Prejdite na profil steven wenger

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    thanks for your reply dino
    im thinking of leaving switzerland before 2 years becose i dont want to lose more of my life here.how is the living in berlin y always heard that the german are kinda unfriendly and racist but i find germans much more friendly than swiss,and the other day somebody that lives in germany told me that the germans acept much better foreigners.
    people tend to think germans are still like in 1940,now the swiss are the actual nazis
    here a clear example .
    http://www.antisvp.antifa.net/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2
    007/SVP%20Sicherheit%20schaffen_1.JPG

  • Adam Zohs

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Firstly Benno - you dont work for Swiss tourism do you??lol.I am from New Zealand, a country that a lot of Swiss people travel to.One of the highlights of my country are the people,and their attitudes.It is our pleasure (On a whole) to help those in need,and welcome those that feel alienated.As you can imagine Zurich is a struggle for someone coming from this kind of society.
    I walked into a Souvenier shop yesterday and found a Tourism t-shirt with Uncle Sam pointing sternly on it.The t-shirt should have stated 'We want you', but instead it says 'How Swiss are you'.In most western societies there would be a public outcry at this kind of direct racism/seperatism,but here it is considered humour.Yes i know it is just a T-shirt but when i sent a photo back home,people thought it mustve been from a right wing memorabilia shop....not a tourist shop.lol.
    On a more positve note I find (in Zurich)women seem to be far more welcoming,helpful and friendly.The men have really let this city down.A hot tip for newcomers:if you need directions or help at all,ask a Swiss lady!!I am engaged to one afterall!:).

  • Adam Zohs

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    I totally agree.I am from a country where it is a pleasure to welcome and help your fellow man/woman.I am also engaged to a total exception to your average swiss person.As much as i want to give up at the moment,i cant for my fiance.PLEASE SWISS PEOPLE PROVE(dont tell) OTHERWISE!!

  • Prejdite na profil Dino D.

    zaslal  v Fórum Švajčiarsko 

    Yeah. That's how Swiss people always react: GENERALIZING and taking EVERYTHING as personally as possible. Without thinking it through and drawing smarter (and more constructive) conclusions. It's that dreadful "either/or" thinking that has dominated the small minds in this country for far too long.

    But the world is much richer and much more complex than that. Especially the social world where everything should be dealt with probabilistically and not deterministically (as you do).

    MOST people I know - whether foreigners or not - agree with me that it's USUALLY difficult to get to know people here. There are only few open-minded people in the German-speaking part of Switzerland, especially in Zurich. It's just a very small city that has no meaning in terms of fashion, pop culture or new media. But that's not how Zurichians see their city.

    I was born and grew up in Zurich. But I used to live in a REALLY big city, a REALLY international metropolis. And it's not only the size that makes a difference, it's also - and to a greater extent - the MENTALITY. The metropolitan mentality that truly embraces diversity is different from Zurich's.

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