Deutschland Forum < Are Germans rude??

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    G.M.

    Aufgegeben von  N W in Deutschland Forum  

    I think the problems comes from 2 different points of view. You are offend by directness or honesty when someone directly speaks to you but try to hide your feelings with a smile whereas German manners what conclude directly addressing the other one with one's feelings. So we would reply in not a harsh but honest way. Hey, you offended me with that kind of saying. For example, if a German is confronted for some kind of rude or aggressive behaviour with being a Nazi, he would in some way directly say, hey I feel offended you calling me a Nazi. So you should do the same. You are not going to be able to change German behavior but you can describe your feelings. You should not conclude from our directness or rudeness that we are cold and bad people but that we simply don't know that we offended you with that sort of behavior. So just simply say, "Hey, that was offensive!" "Hey, du hast mir damit wehgetan!"
    You are right Americans are more open and more lets say liberal than Europeans and especially Germans but they pay a high price for that to in America losing your job, your financial basis is a lot tougher than in any other western state. Freedom does also often mean less security, not police security, but financial security. A welfare state in an extent in which it is really helpful is only possible in a society that is less liberal and more state-oriented. It gives a lot of people a second chance and was acctually invented in Germany (but that's another story). You cover that (in a European point of view) lack with personal welfare and non-governmental organisations that is what lacks in Germany and makes society for outsiders more impersonal and anonymous. Minding anothers business is another way (in my opinion worse way) of avoiding being offend but nonetheless typically German. It has one advantage: you are not directly confronted with problems of other people that you don't know. The state deals with it whereas you simply don't care. I don't like this behavior. In Munich, for example when you walk through the inner city you won't see beggars. They are forbidden to beg in the inner city. We care only when someone tells us that we should. So tell them when you are offended and I will tell you a lot of Germans would have pangs of remorse. Except some bunch of aholes that exist in every society. I did it a lot of times as well and it helps to come along quite easily.

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